Diary entry 1...

Diary entry 1.

I remember talking to a girl that I used to know and feeling like I didn’t even know who she was anymore. She sounded so cold, so dead so heartless, so calculated. So much “ matrix” like , so much following a program. I’m in a relationship because I must, not because I’m in love with the dude , just because I must.  I want to have a baby because it’s time, I’m at age and it’s what people do, and I just want one. Almost as just part of my plan, just part of “my life”. You get the clear feeling of someone who cares more about the “ concept of my life” , instead of my actual life . Meaning living my actual life, feeling it, living it. It was like talking to “ a thing” , an artificial intelligence., not a living being. But that’s just “ IT”, isn’t it? , she has no BEING. That’s just “ it”, there is no BEING on the planet at the moment.  None,  I mean I have counted, I have looked around and I have counted 2 or 3 people with some BEING that’s it, I mean literally 2, 3, less than 10. That’s just unbelievable, 6 BILLIONS MINDS, I repeat 6 BILLIONS, and quite literally you can count who has some Being  with your ten fingers. That’s just so wrong , so sick, so not right. They all are supposed to be “ Human Being”, but guess what? , that’s the kicker, they are not , they are half beast half human, they all believe to be Human Being, but they are NOT. They are below “ humane”. And the thing is it’s natural . The planet, the sun and everything else here is in sub as well  all asleep , sick, vicious, dead, dark, dense. It’s all normal. Being Heartless is the norm for now. Talking to her felt depressing , just feeling Life being sucked out of you, sudeenly feel down , heavy, dense. It felt very sickening.  Kept thinking how can you be so heartless, so dead, so lifeless?.

Diary entry 2.

I cried today, why because I realized something very  drastic, and that is “ I TRIED”, God know I tried, I tried showing to friends , family, strangers… to all the value of questioning of Wisdom , but they all told me to get lost. Or simply didn’t realize the Value, the importance of what I was trying to convey to them. I was literally trying to give them the elixir of Life, the God of all healing , the God of Medecine,  the only wealth worth having. Unfortunately, they didn’t think so,  the thing is , when they will , and will be very very soon, I might not be here to help anymore, it’s a shame really , really a shame, it’s like you missed an opportunity one which might not come again in a couple of centuries. By the time, you realize you might need me , it’ll be too late , I would have moved on, what a shame.. but that’s that. That’s what happened.